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So we are definitely going to move to Madison. Now we just have to see what Heartland says about a moving package. Then we will know more about when we will end up moving. They are supposed to call Monday and then James will tell them he can start as soon as they want him to.

James has been home while we wait for him to start back with Heartland. Him being home has been driving me nuts. He had already hurt his back so he lays in bed most of the time with my laptop or watching TV. I have not worked in almost a month so I can not just sit around lazy or he will think that is all I do all day. ( Even though it is. LOL ) I have to look like I do something normally so I have been keeping busy cleaning and organizing.

I do not see how we can keep organizing and throwing away things we do not really need every time we move and yet we still have tons of junk. Each time we moved I got rid of books, toys, and clothes that were too young for the kids now. Some how we have too many things to fit in the house yet again. This morning we started on Nicole and Neona's room. I am going to start throwing things away and then when I am done I will start packing up things we do not use often.

There are two main things I have learned from moving all the time. There is no such thing as starting to pack too early. No matter how early you start you always end up at the last minute saying. OMG I did not realise how much stuff was still left to pack. The other thing I have learned is NEVER tape the boxes shut until they are about to get in the moving truck. Even if you have not used something in years, the second you tape it shut in a box you will need it. Oh yeah, and label everything on all side. That way when you do have to look through boxes you do not have to move them all around to see what is inside.

Well, James took the girls to visit with his grandparents and help them put up decorations for Christman so I am going to change a load of laundry and then relax while I can.

My goodness, my life can and will change at the drop of a hat.

James called me yesterday afternoon. He said that Heartland called him and they set up a meeting for Wednesday. I asked him if the meeting was in Chicago. He said no, Madison. HUH? How does this keep happening?

They told him that they are still unsure about Chicago but they wanted to know if he would be willing to take District Manager of Madison. (I knew something was up when his old bosses told him that if he did not get the job they still wanted him back in the company.) He asked them about pay and said that he would never even consider it if it was below what he made before. They said that it should not be a problem.

Chicago and Madison are in the same region of stores. Apparently Madison wants to split off into its own region and buy more stores. Maybe they are not even hiring for Chicago any more if they are going to split. They said that James would be DM in the Madison area.

DM and RM normally get relocation covered but he is not really relocating since he has not worked for them since April. James brought up on the phone that he would have to move if he took the job since it is two hours away. The guy said that they would talk more on Wednesday.

James said that if they want him enough they will pay for it. He said that he has also heard of them loaning moving costs and then just deducting it from bonuses. I told him to make sure he reminds them that we just spent thousands moving here.

I did a city comparison for our city, Chicago, and Madison and found huge differences. The schools are better in Madison and the crime is lower. I worry about the cost of living being higher in Madison though. I found that the average person makes $10,000 more a year there than our town and Chicago. I also found that the vast majority in the city have at least a 4 year degree. So we will be lower on the totem pole there. LOL

Well, James meets with the guy Wednesday in Madison. He asked what I thought and if I was willing to move there. I told him that as long as they offer a better salary than he had before since it is a higher cost of living and we have money to move some how, I will go along with it. I did tell him that if we are going to do this he needs to try to get it all moving fast. I do not want to have to deal with all the driving back and forth and living separate for a month again. It ends up costing us tons in gas and food.

So like always, I sit and wait. Maybe all this is not still to teach me to stop being afraid of change. Maybe it is to teach me patience or to be able to just sit and let life happen without stressing all of the time.

The kids have no school this week. They have off for conferences the first three days and then the end of the week is Thanksgiving break. It worked out really nice. This way they get a week off so families can go somewhere for the holiday. This family however will not be going any where. We will just be cleaning and organizing. Yippy.

The girls went into vacation mode the second they got home from school Friday. They kept trying to tell me it was their break so they should have a break from chores too. I let the chores get backed up so they could have some fun time before we start the major work. All they have wanted to do all weekend is play video games. They do not normally get to just sit around playing video games.

This weekend I told them they could do whatever they wanted and stay up as late as they wanted but starting Monday we have work to do. I was shocked to find that given the opportunity to do anything all they wanted to do was nonstop video games. So first thing this morning they tried to play video games. This is when they got informed that there will be no video games all day. I may actually extend it longer if they are still so preoccupied with them tomorrow.

Well, I told the girls that for everyday that they get a lot of cleaning done we will do a science experiment. Today we are going to go with probably the easiest one I can think of. I like easy and not too messy.

Tower Of Ice / Icy Blocks

Place an ice cube on a flat surface.
Sprinkle salt on top of the ice cube. Press another ice cube onto the salted area. Hold the second cube in place for 30 seconds.

Continue adding salt and ice cubes until your tower topples.

*The salt melts some of the ice, turning it into water. When you place another ice cube over the salt and press down, the water refreezes and joins the cubes together.

It seems that some greater force still wants me to get further along in my struggle to overcome my fear of change. I thought I had come along way. I have willingly went along with two moves that have changed my life completely. I may have dragged my feet and even dug my heels in a few times, but I did allow change in the end.

First I left a job of 4 years where a management job was going to open up and I was next in line. I moved to Sierra Vista and left behind my job, my friends, and my family. Then 8 months later, just as I got settled in we had to move across the country. This time I left behind a not so promising job and not so good of friends. I did however leave my family much further behind.
After arriving here it seemed that all my worries were coming true. The house we are stuck renting is horrible. The neighbors are horrible.

It is now becoming more obvious that the money they promised James at work is not going to happen. First they said that they would start him at lower pay until he shows them what he can do. Then after he started making them a lot more money they said that they felt the 4% of profit they promised him was too much to pay him. Then of course there is the fact that I quit working for them. So all in all this move was not at all what we expected.

So yesterday while I was cleaning and rearranging the bedroom I started seeing things that brought back memories and thoughts. I started seeing all of the things we have from James' last company. We have tons of things with the company name on them. The more I saw the more I thought about it. I sat looking at his old business cards. James was a different person when he worked for them. He was a stronger more confident man because he was treated with respect because of the knowledge he had and the ability he had to make money in even the worst store.

Working for these owners has changed him. He is not a happy person any more. He has had to stopped acting like a strong and confident man because it intimidates them. They do not want to hear how much he knows about business because it is making them realise how little they really know. They want him to just sit back and be a babysitter.

James has already said that he wants to leave but he feels he can't until I have steady pay. We moved to be closer to his dad so we can't just up and move for another job. Jobs like his do not normally just happen to open up in the same town as you.

I decided to go online and try to find a web site for the company he used to work for. Just on a whim I wanted to see if they were hiring anywhere near here. As soon as I googled Heartland I saw a job ad on careerbuilder.com for a district and regional manager in the Chicago area.

I was always against him checking into jobs in Chicago. He mentioned checking into if Heartland had jobs available way back when we first started considering moving here. The only regions near here that they own are Chicago and Madison,WI so I said no way.

As soon as I saw it I knew that I had to tell him about the ad and I had to go along with whatever choice he made. He is so unhappy right now and if he stays where he is he will never be any more than he is today. He was only going to work a half a day so I gave him a call. I told him that there was a job ad that I did not think he should ignore. He tried to not seem excited about it but I knew he was.

He came home right away and started to update his resume. I do not know if he was too anxious or if he just knows that I am great at all things (LOL) but he asked me to make him a new resume. As I made his resume he called his old bosses to see what their attitude was towards him applying so he would know what kind of reference they would give.

The first one said that he better go for it and if they called he would tell them that they better hire him. The second one said that they just had an Arizona regional meeting last week and talked about how he would be perfect for that job but thought he would not want it since he was promised so much at his new job. He also said that he would call his boss and ask him to put in a good word. James had forgot about their boss Drew so he never added him to his references. Drew loved him and golfed with him.

So James applied to the ad after I finished his resume. The ad was posted 6 days before but it did say ***Needed Immediately*** so hopefully it has not been filled. We also do not know what corporate put in his file when he quit to move. We both are now excited but not admitting it because we do not want to get our hopes up. If he is rehire-able and they have not hired anyone already it should be a very good chance. He already knows the company up and down and has been trained, tested, and certified level 200 (district manager).

The reality though is who knows what will happen. If he does get the job we will have to move again. This time would be less far than the Sierra Vista move though. Chicago area is only 45 minutes south of us. I already told him I am not ever going to live in Chicago but I will live close.

So now back to sitting, waiting, and wondering. I hoped that James would get a call first thing this morning and then he would call me and then all the stress would be over. I want to text him and ask if he has heard anything from anyone but I also do not want to get him more excited and then him get upset if he does not get it.

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH, I just want a normal life. You know one of those lives where you live the same white house with a picket fence your whole life raising kids and then grand kids. I want a plain old boring life.